Lost

lost.. in my own place
lost in my own playground.. lost in my chair, in my own body.. i am so lost
i dont know where i am, while i am where i want to be,
i dont know where i am to go, while i am going where i dream to be
what am i doing here, and what am i going to do there
i dont have a plan i dont have a goal..
i dont have a dream i dont have a hope
if theres no aim then why spending all my breaths and thoughts on..
nothingness!
but i am here, i exist..
illusions , everything i know.. what am i sure of?
i read some lines.. every day a new phrase a new word...
and i am lost between meanings... i understand everything but nothing makes sense to me.. my steps my speach.
who am i.. what is it that i want to be?
i remember a home i dreamt of
a soul.. a company
something to give.. just something simple.
and i remember.. someone
who was killed .. thats me
i am nothing but a shadow of a girl i used to be.
i am lost and not found!